Walter and Deborah stood in front of the Autodoc.
“Recreate a CPU, Memory, and I/O interface for Adelle”, Deborah told the Autodoc. Immediately, a metallic sphere connected to a metallic cylinder which connected to a plug appeared. It promptly split into pieces.
“What went wrong?”
“The CPU and Memory unit are only stable at liquid nitrogen temperatures and cooler”
Damm computers - so literal
“Could you reproduce a suitable container, filled with liquid nitrogen, or is there a better procedure?””
“The best procedure is to create the CPU, Memory, and I/O interface in a dewar flask containing liquid helium, and then connect to the I/O interface. Best procedure includes loading a boot loader into the CPU. Then move the dewar to the computer room and plug it in. The dewar is designed to keep the CPU and Memory suitably cool for 2 days.”
“Why didn’t you say so?”
“There is no damage control procedure for the ship’s computers. The designers felt that the redundancy levels were so great, that if anything happened to all of the computers, then the timeship was probably destroyed anyway”.
“I want to talk to these designers”, Walter remarked.
“Please recreate a CPU, Memory, and I/O interface for the ship’s computer, in a suitable dewar that we can install”
A large rectangular box appeared.
“Let’s install it and see what happens”
So they carefully picked up the box and carried it out of the autodoc, down the hallway a couple of hundred meters, until they came to door 174243. They put down the box and Deborah opened the door. Then they slid the box into the data center.
The old computer had been simply smashed - it looked like somebody had taken a sledge hammer to it. Debris was everywhere.
“I think we didn’t think this through. I think we were so excited that we didn’t do a good job of planning. For example, we should have inspected this room and cleaned it up first.” Deborah said”. I wonder what other mistakes we’re going to make.
“Well, we can clean up later. There are some pipes, and two sockets and two cables. We just unplug the old cables, like so - “ Walter unplugged the two cables “ disconnect the plumbing”, Walter turned the fitting and the pipes came free “ - and slide out the old CPU.” He then slid the old CPU through the door and left it in the hall. “Now, slide in the new CPU”. They pushed the new CPU into position. The pipes fit into place with the fittings, and the cables lined up with the pipes. Deborah plugged in the cables while Walter fretted with the piping.
“Now, all we need to do is reduce the temperature in the Dewar to liquid helium temperatures. Adelle?”, Deborah asked.
“Yes?”
“How do we do activate the new CPU?”
“You have to fill the cooling system with Helium, and then turn on the cooling system”, Adelle answered.
“You mean that the cooling system has no Helium in it?
“No”
“Why didn’t you mention this?”
“You didn’t ask”, Adelle responded.
Damm computers.
“Okay. How much Helium do we need?”
“330 grams is the bare minimum, 1.5 kilograms is the recommended charge.”
“Okay. Please create 1.5 kilograms of helium in a suitable container for recharging the cooling system”
“It is ready for you at the Autodoc”
“Can you bring it here?”
“No. The autodoc can only replicate things within itself. It is not a transporter”
“Tell me that once we get the ship somewhat repaired, this is going to get easier”, Walter groaned.
“The damage control procedures in the documentation assume that the ship has at least one working transporter or at least one working replicator”.
“So you don’t know what you’re doing”
“I am the commanding officer of this expedition so by definition, I know what I am doing”
“Yes ma’am!”. Walter saluted her with his left hand.
“Larry Niven wrote: One mark of a good officer, was the ability to make quick decisions. If they happen to be right, so much the better.”
I am just a walking Bartlett's quotations. I wonder why?
“Who was Larry Niven?”
“An American science fiction writer. I am going back to the autodoc to get the Helium. Please clean up the debris - put it in the corner over there where it will be out of the way - and I will be back in a few minutes”
Deborah walked out and started walking a couple of hundred meters back to the autodoc. Walter started cleaning up the mess.
When Deborah arrived at the autodoc, there was a cylinder 1 meter tall by 50 cm in diameter. It had a pipe at one end with a valve handle and a collar with some wings. Deborah grabbed the handle of the cylinder. It felt like it weighed 10 kilograms. She walked back a couple of hundred meters to door 174243. Walter had made a neat little pile of debris in the far corner of the room.
Walter has made good progress.
There was fitting with a valve in one of the pipes that looked like the fitting on the side of the cylinder.
“Adelle”, Deborah asked.
“Yes?”, the computer replied.
“Is the procedure that I connect this container to this fitting here where I am pointing, then turn the valve on the container and turn the valve on the fitting?”
“Yes.”
“Does it matter in which order I open the valves?”
“Yes, open the valve on the fitting first, then open the valve on the container”
“Why?”, Walter asked.
“The fitting may leak otherwise. The expansion ratio of Helium is 757:1 so the helium will expand to 8.4 cubic meters, which would asphyxiate you”.
“Deborah: I have a suggestion. Open the valve on the fitting first, then open the valve on the container.”
Deborah held the container to the fitting. Walter turned the collar on the fitting until it was tight.
“You realize that if this thing leaks, it will kill us both, right?”
“Right. No pressure”
“Walter, that’s the point of this procedure. No pressure. Open the valve on the pipe”.
Walter opened the valve. Nothing happened. Walter opened the valve on the container. There was a hissing sound for a few tens of seconds.
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Is it done?”
“The cooling system is now recharged”
“Okay, Walter, close the valve on the fitting, then close the valve on the container, and then unscrew that thingy”
Walter did so.
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“How long until the CPU is cool enough to be tested?”
“30 minutes”
“Walter - let’s get something to eat. Also, we need a vacuum cleaner and some garbage bags”
“Okay”
They went to a store room and got two packages of rations. After a quick zap with a microwave oven, they sat down to eat.
“Adelle”?, Walter asked.
“Yes”,
“How long until the CPU is cool enough to be tested?”
“12 minutes”
“Look”, Deborah glared at him, “There are two kinds of problems: the problems you can solve and the problems you can’t solve. Problems you can solve are nothing to worry about. Problems you can’t solve can’t be solved whether you worry about them or not. So stop worrying”
“How do I kill 12 minutes?”
“Adelle can find us anywhere on the ship. Let’s go jogging”
“Okay”
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“We’re going to go running. When the new CPU is ready for testing, test it and then call us with the results as soon as you have them”
“Understood”
They had run about 4 kilometers when Adelle made her announcement: “The new CPU is working perfectly.”
“Great”, Deborah grinned.
“Now that we know what we’re doing, the next 4 CPUs ought to be a piece of pie”
“Cake”
“What?”
“The correct simile is ‘A piece of cake’”
Sure enough, now that they had worked the bugs out of the procedure, they got 3 CPUs up and running before dinner. Walter and Deborah went to a store room and got some rations for dinner. Walter held his hand to his forehead. “I’ve got a headache. I’m going to see the autodoc. Probably just stress. Take my ration and zap it in the microwave oven, and I’ll meet you in a few minutes”. He wandered off towards the autodoc.
Deborah went into the kitchen and put her ration in the microwave oven. A minute later, it was ready to eat. She decided to let Walter’s ration sit until he arrived, which happened about 2 minutes later.
“I have a surprise for you!”, he said, grinning.
“What is it?”
“It’s a sparkling white wine, called Champagne, from what you call France”
“Oh, Walter, that’s a wonderful idea. I love Champagne. There’s just one problem: I can’t drink it because I am pregnant.”
“What does that have to do with it?”
“There’s something called Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. Pregnant women should not drink alcohol: it’s bad for the baby”
“Oh.”
“But Walter, you’re not pregnant, so you can drink it”
“That wouldn’t be right”
“Okay, go back to the autodoc - I assume that’s where you got it - and conjure up some white sparkling non-alcoholic grape juice.”
Walter disappeared for a few minutes and then returned with a second bottle. Deborah got some (plastic) glasses, and poured herself some grape juice. Walter poured himself some wine.
“I propose a toast!”
“What’s that?”
“To the future - may we return to it some day”
“To the future”
The remaining 2 CPUs took less than an hour to do. After it was over, Deborah went to her room, brushed her teeth, flossed, and went to bed. Walter went up to the flight deck and turned on his flight simulator program, and started flying through the mountains, blowing up other airplanes.
Deborah bounced out of bed the next morning, excitedly dressed, and walked quickly to the autodoc.
“I want a breakfast of a stack of 3 buckwheat pancakes, each 20 centimeters in diameter, with 20 milliliters of real maple syrup, served at 80 degrees, with a ball of real butter 2 cm in diameter on the top”
In a moment, a plate appeared. The pancakes were steaming.
“I want a cup of 200 mililiters of orange juice, at 5 °C.”
A cup appeared with cold orange juice appeared. Deborah took her plate of pancakes and cup of orange juice and waltzed down the hallway to the kitchen.
“What’s that?”
“Buckwheat pancakes with real maple syrup and butter. I figured if the Autodoc can create champagne, then it ought to be able to do pancakes. I was right.”
She attacked her pancakes with knife and fork.
“Bfides, Inee enery for da baby”
“Maybe you shouldn’t talk while you’re eating. I can wait”
Deborah swallowed.
“Besides, I need energy for the baby”
Walter watched her stuff herself with Joules in silence. When it was over, Deborah leaned back, and smiled.
“That was wonderful. I’m going to get some more”
With that, she jumped to her feet, fell to her knees, crouched down and vomited.
“Deborah! Deborah! Are you alright? Talk to me”
“I’m not alright, I’m - “ and then she vomited some more.
Walter stroked her hair. “It’s going to be alright.... it will be fine... let me get you to the autodoc”
“Thank you “, only this time, instead of vomiting, she convulsed.
“Adelle!” Walter shouted
“Yes?”
“Medical emergency! Deborah is vomiting! Get her to the Autodoc right away”
“I’m sorry, I can’t do that. There is no working transporter”
Walter picked her up. In ⅙ gravity, she still had a mass of 60 Kilograms, but she only weighed 100 Newtons instead of 600 Newtons, and Walter could easily carry her.
When Walter put her in the chair in the autodoc, she smiled at him. Then he closed the door.
Walter waited. Then he realized that something smelled awful. He looked in a mirror and discovered that he had bile all over the front of his jump suit. So he went back to his cabin and changed into a fresh jump suit. Then he went back to the kitchen, and cleaned up the floor.
The loudspeaker clicked. “Walter, please come to the Autodoc”. Walter ran there.
Deborah was sitting in the autodoc, grinning a grin. “It was morning sickness”.
“What’s that?”
“Pregnant women frequently get nausea or vomit first thing in the morning during the first trimester of pregnancy. The autodoc explained that there is a pill I can take that will alleviate the effects, but it may cause birth defects in my granddaughters, so it isn’t recommended unless the morning sickness interferes with my lifestyle. However, this means that I can’t go out in a spacesuit until the baby is born”
“Vomiting in a space suit would be a disaster”
“Yes, and by the time I’m over the morning sickness, my belly won’t fit in the space suit.”
“Do we need to go outside the ship?”
“Yes, we will have to repair the hull”
“Are you sure? The radiation level outside the iron shielding is 5400 milli-Seiverts” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Millisievert http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Europa_(moon)
“Let’s wait until we come to that. Right now, I want to get a working replicator”
“I think we should maintain our exercise routine. You want to stay healthy for the delivery”
“Okay, I think I’m up to it”
They changed into shorts and T-shirts and ran 10 Kilometers. Then they went to the exercise room and stretched and pulled and pushed for an hour. Then they practiced martial arts for a couple of hours. Then, they ate lunch. Walter had a small Chicago style pizza with fresh tomatos and Deborah had a slice of turkey along with a tossed green salad and a light vinaigrette dressing. I’m glad the autodoc is working as a replicator - the rations were okay, but real lettuce!
After lunch, they went to the flight deck.
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Look up and display repair procedures for a replicator”
Windows opened on both of their screens, filled with small text and diagrams. They started reading.
“Here is the first problem - repairing the replicator assumes that you have a working replicator.”
“The designers assumed that 5 way redundancy of two different systems would be sufficient. But we have a replicator in the autodoc”
“That’s limited to 150 centimeters in any dimension. The mass injector alone is 2 meters tall by 200 centimeters wide by 170 centimeters deep. And, it weighs 250 kilograms.
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Please look up and display repair procedures for a mass injector”
“Do you want the mass injector for a replicator, a transporter, or an autodoc?”
“A replicator”
“On your display”
They kept reading.
“I think I understand this. On page 28 is a list of parts required to build a mass injector. Pages 29 through 123 are the procedures for building one. Pages 124 through 183 are diagnosis and repair procedures.”
“I think you’re right”
“We’re going to have to make the autodoc build the parts on page 28. I count 156 parts that have to be assembled properly. We can do this job in the shop.”
“It must be a hundred meters from the shop to the autodoc. If we carry one part at a time, that means we will walk almost 32 Kilometers just carrying parts. We should get some labels and a container.”
“We could use a box that the rations come in, and we can have the autodoc make the labels”
“That would work”
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“I want you to refer to the parts list for a replicator. I want you to send instructions to the autodoc to create all the parts that we need to build one. If a part cannot be built, then it should be flagged. All of the parts should be labeled so that we can tell which part is which. Can you do that?”
“Yes, I can. All of the parts can be built with the autodoc”
“How do we lift something that weighs 250 kilograms?”
“In 1/6th gravity, that’s only 400 newtons. Besides, we could turn off the artificial gravity for a little while”
They moved a workbench into the replicator room, along with boxes of parts, and set to work. After 2 weeks of working 8 hours a day, the replicator was ready for installation. They plugged everything in, and turned everything on.
“Adelle?”
“yes”
“Please run all validation tests on the new replicator”
“Executing”
There was a pause for 3 or 4 seconds.
“Failure in module QXZ47 test 2 subtest 15. The resistance in circuit 473 should be 2000 kilohms but is only 3 ohms.”
“Deborah, do you smell something?”
“Yes, I do. Something’s burning”
Then a klaxon sounded, very loudly. AHH-OOO-GAH! AHH-OOO-GAH! Deborah jumped.
“Fire in room 13978. Fire in room 13978”
“Adelle, initiate fire suppression procedures”, Deborah shouted. Fire in a space ship! We’re dead!”
“Deborah, we’re in room 13978”
“Fire suppression procedure is inoperative. There are no transporters operational”
“Look around for a fire extinguisher”
Deborah looked by the door, because where and when she came from, fire extinguishers are always near the door. She didn’t find one.
“Adelle?”, Walter shouted, “What is the normal fire fighting procedure”
“The normal fire suppression procedure is to use the transporter to flood the compartment with a fluoro-carbon gas. The primary fire suppression procedure is inoperative because there are no transporters available. The backup fire suppression procedure is to vent the compartment’s atmosphere into space. Backup fire suppression procedure is inoperative due to law 1 violation”
“Walter - that’s good news! The computer won’t kill us. Let’s get out of here, before she changes her mind”
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Remove all power from the replicator”
“All power is removed from the replicator”
They left the room.
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Backup fire suppression procedure, room 13978”
“Initiating backup fire suppression procedure, room 13978”
Deborah heard a hissing sound from the door. It gradually faded away. She was breathing heavily. Oh, shit. I don’t want to smell anything bad She vomited. She knelt on the floor.
“Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not okay, I’m pregnant, I’ve smelled something awful, I’ve just come out of a life-threatening situation, and now I’ve puked all over the corridor floor. And that’s just today! I’ve spent the last eight weeks on the far side of the solar system with a crippled time ship, a horrible war criminal, a stupid computer, and a mission to save humanity that’s going to hell in a hand basket. I’m not going to mention the homicidal maniac who followed me to the far side of the solar system and marooned me here, just for sake of argument. And if you give me a moment, I’m sure I’ll come up with some more reasons to be miserable! I didn’t ask for this - I wanted to be a scholar - I was studying the writings of a man who won’t be born for another thousand years”
She started to cry.
“I just want to go home”
Walter sat down next to her. She leaned her head against his shoulder and wept. After a few minutes, she stopped.
“Deborah?”
“Yes”
“Are you okay now?”
“Yes”
“The replicator isn’t going to go anywhere. Go back to your quarters, change out of your jumpsuit, take a shower, get some rest. I will clean up the mess here and then go play some video games. When you are feeling better, let me know and we will figure out what to do next”.
He stood up. He extended a hand to her, and she pulled herself to her feet.
“Walter?”
“Yes”
“I’m sorry I called you a horrible war criminal”
“I’ve been called worse, and under more important circumstances.”
“Really?”
“Yes - it’s not something I’m very proud of”
“If you’re willing to talk, then I am willing to listen”
“I was called a horrible monster”
“That’s not so bad”
“I was in court, getting divorced from my wife at the time”
“Did she say that in court?”
“The judge said that from the bench, just before she assessed a fairly hefty property settlement”
“There’s a lot about you that I don’t know. How long were you married?”
“22 years”
“Children?”
“A boy and a girl”
“How old?”
“Well, they won’t be born for another 3700 years, but they were in their teens when we divorced and were young adults with children of their own when I was sent away with you”
“I’m sorry - I’ve been selfish and self-absorbed”
“Nonsense - I am having the adventure of a lifetime. Why just today, I was almost killed!”
“Is that sarcasm?”
“No - adventures are dangerous. You go new places, do new things, you frequently don’t know what you are doing. Nobody has ever gone back this far in time, except Unrar. Deborah, you are actually very pleasant company, and you are the nicest jailer I’ve ever had. I like you. I want to be your friend.”
“I would like to be your friend, too. But I am your commanding officer.”
“I accept that. So what’s a little vomit between friends? Now, go take a shower, get some rest, and change into a clean jumpsuit. You smell awful”
“And here we were talking so nicely”
“Real friends will tell you that you smell bad. False friends will just let you go on stinking up the place”
“Walter, I want you to go back to the autodoc and have it replicate 4 large, hand held CO2 fire extinguishers, some hooks to hook them to the wall, and some screws to screw the hooks into the wall. When you are back, we will re-pressurize the room and go back in there.”
Deborah started walking back to her quarters. Walter walked alongside her, towards the autodoc.
Walter and Deborah gathered at the door to the replicator. Each of them had a CO2 fire extinguisher in hand, with another on the floor close by. They were dressed in protective clothing and wore breathing apparatus.
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Pressurize room 13978”.
Again, Deborah heard a hissing sound from the door.
“Walter, are you ready?”
“Yes”
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Open the door to room 13978”
The door opened. Walter then Deborah rushed in, fire extinguishers at the ready. There was no smoke at all. There was a coating of particles of various colors on the floor in front of the replicator. The ceiling was black. Walter carefully cracked his breathing apparatus, and sniffed. “I don’t smell anything”, he said.
He took off his breathing apparatus and helmet. He looked at Deborah. Deborah looked at him. He inhaled deeply. He nodded. She took off her breathing apparatus and helmet.
“Do you think it is safe to open it?”, Walter asked.
“I don’t know. Do you think it is safe to open it?”, Deborah answered.
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Is it safe to open the replicator?”
“All power is off to the replicator. Concentrations of noxious gases are below limits. All temperatures are normal.”
“We open it”, Deborah muttered.
Inside, there was a long cylinder which was now broken into two pieces. Deborah carefully pulled it out and laid it on the workbench.
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Please examine the part on the workbench. What is it?”
“It is a phototonic calibrater”
“Why did it break?”
“Excessive current went through it. The maximum current was 2 amperes, but I estimate that the actual current was 1200 amperes.”
“Does a phototonic calibrater follow Ohm’s law? May I model its connectivity as a resistor?”
“No, the voltage across it must not exceed 150 volts, or else thermal runaway will occur.”
“What’s thermal runaway?”, Walter asked.
“It’s a failure mode in semiconductors. If the semiconductor gets warm, then its conductivity increases, so the resistance decreases, so the current increases, so the power dissipation increases as the square of the current, which makes the semiconductor warmer.”, Deborah explained. “Adelle: why was there excessive voltage across the photonic calibrater?”
“There is a 92% probability that the excessive current stems from a problem in the QXZ47 module”
“Alright. I want to scrap the QXZ47 module in the replicator, and I want to make a new one. I also want a test procedure by which I can test the module before installation”
“I can build a module test frame work using the autodoc”
I find it remarkable how sometimes can Adelle can be so helpful and sometimes Adelle can be so rigid. There must be some fundamental limits on what can be done with artificial intelligence.
Deborah found and removed module QXZ47 from the replicator. She could see a burn mark on one of the components on it. Walter and Deborah left the room and walked to the autodoc. There, they found a new module QXZ47 and a box about 15 centimeters square by 6 centimeters high with a power cord on one side, a red light, a green light, a blue light and a connector on the top. They set box on a table, and plugged it in. A blue LED turned on.
“Adelle”
“yes”
“What is the test procedure?”
“Insert module QXZ47 into the connector. The test apparatus will detect the module and initiate testing. I will report the test results when complete”
Deborah inserted the module into the connector. The green light started blinking. After a few seconds, the red light turned on steadily.
“Module QXZ47 fails test 2 subtest 15 and test 5 subtest 3. Recommend scrapping the module”, Adelle announced.
Deborah removed the module from the tester and set it aside. Then she took the new module and inserted it in the tester. Again, then green light started blinking. Again, after a few seconds, the red light turned on steadily.
“Module QXZ47 fails test 2 subtest 15. Recommend scrapping the module”, Adelle announced.
“That’s a brand new module”, Walter mentioned.
“Yeah, that’s right. Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Why did this brand new module fail?”
“Unknown”
“Was it a defect in manufacturing?”
“That seems unlikely”
“Is it a test failure?”
“That seems unlikely”
“Is there a flaw in the design?”
“Yes”
You might have said something, Deborah thought.
“Describe the problem, please”
“There is an engineering directive, 2456-34-AH-L which says that the QXZ47 module needs a larger power transistor Q23 which connects circuit 2346 to circuit 19342. If the transistor is overloaded, then junction breakdown will occur and the voltage applied to circuit 19342 will exceed 15 volts. The power transistor should have a maximum allowable collector current greater than 2 amperes. 20 Amperes is a better value.”
“So, was the library design of the QXZ47 module not updated according to engineering directive - what was the engineering directive?”
“2456-34-AH-L”
“Was the design change described in that directive applied to the library description of the QXZ47 module?”
“No”
“Well, that explains that”, Walter said, “I wonder what other design changes were made that didn’t make it into the library”.
“The designers haven’t been born yet. But when they are, I’m going to attack them with a dull knife”
“And you think I’m a war criminal.”
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Can you modify the description of module QXZ47 to include a larger power transistor that will handle at least 20 amperes?”
“Yes”
“Please do and recreate another one”
This shouldn’t be this difficult.
After a moment, a new part appeared. This one was labeled QXZ47-A. Deborah took it and plugged it into the test apparatus. The green light started blinking. After a few seconds, the green light turned on steadily.
“The module passes all tests”
Finally, the replicator was again ready for installation. They plugged everything in, and turned everything on.
“Adelle?”
“yes”
“Please run all validation tests on the new replicator”
“Executing”
There was a pause for 3 or 4 seconds.
“All validation tests pass”
“Alright. I want you to make a chocolate milkshake, 500 milliliters, in a glass with a straw”
A glass appeared, but its contents were green. Walter picked it up, and began to put it on the workbench. Then he moved faster, and let go of it as soon as he could. It began to vaporize, and then it formed a black crust. Walter and Deborah stared at it.
“It’s hot. I think I’ve burned my fingers”
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“Please show me a picture of a Chocolate milkshake, 500 milliliters, in a glass with a straw”
A window opened on the monitor. It showed a picture of a Chocolate milkshake, about half a liter, in a glass glass, with water droplets condensing on the sides, with a straw, circa 1955.
“Adelle?”
“Yes”
“What is the difference between what is in the picture and what is on the workbench? How do we fix it so that what is on the floor looks like, and tastes like, what is in the picture”
“Stand by”. Walter and Deborah waited. “Calibration of the protein folding subsystem is incorrect. Also, the Maxwell Demon is not working correctly”
“What do we have to do to fix it?”
“The Maxwell Demon has to be working correctly or the proteins will disassociate upon creation.”
Damm computer! How do we fix the Maxwell Demon?
“To adjust the Maxwell Demon, follow procedure 29172-22.”
“Please display procedure 29172-22.”
“I’m hungry, and I’m bored.”, Walter announced.
“I’m frustrated”, Deborah responded, “and I’ll bet that once we get these two problems resolved, then something else is going to pop up. I wonder if the engineering directive not getting into the library is an isolated instance or is evidence of a systemic problem? Murphy’s law says that it’s a systemic issue”
“Murphy’s law?”
“Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. I’m hungry, too, and I am eating for two. We can return after dinner”
Dinner was Atlantic Salmon on spinach with a light raspberry dressing. Dessert was orange sherbert, cold, in a glass dish. They didn’t say very much during the meal. After everything was put away, they looked at each other and wandered back to the replicator.
Procedure 29172-22 turned out to be remarkably simple to do: create some triple cells for various substances and measure their temperatures with a precision electronic thermometer, then tell the computer. A triple cell is a sealed container that contains a substance. When the container is at the triple point temperature, then solid, liquid, and gas exist in equilibrium. Deborah read through the procedure to make sure she understood it. Walter walked to the shop to get a precision electronic thermometer. When Walter returned, they got to work.
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Please create a standard water triple point cell in a suitable stand”
Immediately, a triple cell appeared. Walter and Deborah stared at it. There was no ice or water inside it. Walter inserted his precision thermometer. “121.29 °C”
“It should be 0.01 °C”
“Adelle”
“Yes”
“Please note that the temperature of the water triple cell you just generated was 121.29 °C and recalibrate”
“Recalibration completed”
“Please create a chloroform triple point cell”
Immediately, another triple point cell appeared. Walter and Deborah stared at it. There was some solid chloroform in it. Walter inserted his thermometer again.
“Adelle”
“yes”
“The Chloroform triple cell temperature is -142.84 °C”
“Recalibration completed”
They repeated this procedure with Formic acid, Hydrogen Chloride, and Isobutane. With each recalibration, the temperature got closer to the “correct” value.
“I think the Maxwell Demon is calibrated, do you agree?”
“Yes”
“Walter?”
“Yes”
“Good. Let’s go on to the protein folder”
Deborah scrolled through the procedure.
“It says here to create a steak. Adelle”
“Yes”
“Please create a 400 gram beef steak, raw, on a dinner plate”
A raw steak appeared on a dinner plate.
“Walter, check the temperature of the steak”
Walter fired the infrared thermometer at the steak.
“4 °C”
“Let’s take the steak to the autodoc for analysis”
Walter picked up the plate and the two of them walked to the autodoc.
“How may I help you?”, the autodoc asked.
“We have a beef steak here that we want you to analyze. Make sure that there are no pathogens in it, no toxins, and that the proteins are what they should be. How long will that take?”
“About 10 minutes”
“Fine. I’m going to the latrine. There’s a baby where my bladder used to be. I’ll be back”. Deborah turned on her heel and left the room.
“Would you play some music for me while I am waiting?”, Walter asked.
“What would you like?”, Adelle answered.
“Stairway to heaven by Led Zepplin”
Immediately, the haunting guitar and flute began to play.
Deborah returned.
“And... she’s.... buying... a.... stairway........... to heaven”
“Is that anybody we know?”, Deborah asked.
“That was one of the great rock n’ roll tunes of all time, by a British group called Led Zepplin, released in 1971”
“What’s a Zeppelin?”
“It’s a lighter than air vehicle a rigid consisting of a cylindrical trussed and covered frame supported by internal gas cells. The gas cells usually contain Hydrogen or Helium”
“Why would anybody build a Zepplin out of lead? That’s one of the densest substances known and it’s not very strong”
“It’s spelled L E D, not L E A D.”
“Why?”
“I think it was a subtle joke. I don’t know.”
“Is the analysis done yet?”
“It still has about a minute to go”
“What is it about half century old music that fascinates you so?”
“Your late 1960s and 1970s was a time of tremendous creativity. The United States had gotten trapped in a guerrilla war in Southeast Asia, and a lot of young people, who were being sent to fight the war, failed to see the point of it, and wrote literature and music about it. The United States also had a tremendous baby boom in the late 1940s, after the second world war, and those young people had reached an age and level of maturity to contribute to the popular culture”
“I thought you said that Led Zepplin was a British group?”
“Led Zepplin was very popular in the United States. The British also had a post world war 2 baby boom. Most wars are followed by baby booms”.
“The analysis is complete”, the autodoc announced. “Insofar as I can tell, the beef steak has no pathogens, no toxic substances, and all normal proteins. All of the amino acids are the correct enantiomer. The steak should be safe to eat”.
“What’s an enantiomer?” Walter asked. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enantiomer
“A lot of complicated molecules have handedness, that is, there are two ways of shaping them: one left handed and one right handed. Two molecules are enantiomers if they have the same structure but differ in handedness. We should test the steak by eating it.”, Deborah said.
“I guess so”.
Deborah carried the plate to the kitchen and set it in the Microwave oven. In a moment, it was ready. Walter fired his infrared thermometer. “60°C”
“It doesn’t look very brown”, Deborah said.
“The microwave doesn’t brown anything, for that you have to grill it. You specified a raw steak. If you are going to eat it, then you should have specified a steak grilled to your specification”
“Excuse me - the book said 4 °C”
Deborah cut a piece, and ate it. “Rubbery”, she said.
